Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
