ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
