After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize