at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
