try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
