he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Randomize
