sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
