im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
