you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
