just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
This is my gift to your gina
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
