You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize