I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
