how hairy? two words: wookie tits
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
