David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
