I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Dear god my vagina.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
