And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Randomize
