So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
