A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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