I want to make a zoo with you.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
