Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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