someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
