Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
