But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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