and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
