We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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