i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
