Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
they need to just BURY HIM!
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
