Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
