Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize