Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
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