Dual....:-)
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
