whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
