Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
