Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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