Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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