I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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