pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize