so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
