there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
