I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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