The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Randomize
