are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
