i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
