whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
