when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
