Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
So here I am, sexting at work.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
