Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
We had to coat check the pizza.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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