Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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