dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
