He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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